The Cortisol Rollercoaster

We judge ourselves harshly, but there’s no-one more in-sync than a mom and her child with additional needs. We are their “person”. Their translator, their guide, their protector, their comfort, and their forever buddy. We are everything to our children.  From the first moment we sense a vulnerability in them, we begin to weave an […]

Redefining Success

If you’re the parent of a newly-diagnosed child, it’s important to allow yourself to feel all the feelings, because grief comes in waves. It’s a significant journey to acceptance. Cry if you need to, but don’t stay in that place. Make yourself a coffee, or go for a walk, focus on breathing in and out. […]

The Perpetual Present

I exist purely and almost perpetually in the present moment.  I show up as I am, and try the best I can. Somedays, I’m not enough. Somedays, I’m far too much.  This is the life of an autism mom. My boy is my life. Absolutely, my life. Every waking and sleepless moment is consumed by […]

Bubbles!

Without doubt, one of Aidan’s favourite things in the whole world is… BUBBLES!  From a young age he has been utterly captivated by them. He loves watching them take form on the wand, he is breathless with anticipation as they take flight, he is delighted by the way the breeze catches them and sends them […]

The Leviathan

As early as 65 B.C., the Roman poet Horace, wrote about the “Black Dog” of depression. And the image of a sullen black dog, shadowing your every move is an extremely vivid one that many depression sufferers can relate to. Winston Churchill found the description so apt, that he later adopted it himself. Though he […]

Tossing & Turning

If you’re the parent of a newly-diagnosed child, the “who’s”, “how’s”, and what ifs” will definitely be keeping you up at night. A million questions churn through our minds as we contemplate a different life than the one we expected. It takes time and processing for us to realise that while our parenting journey may […]

Beware the Bullshit

When you become a special needs parent, many things don’t make sense to you until you begin to realise what your unique trajectory is. Your baby isn’t having expected responses to certain things, or isn’t feeding happily, or sleeping well. And as time passes, you begin to pick up that they’re not hitting milestones as […]

Sisyphus

The Greek myth goes that Sisyphus was condemned by Zeus to roll a massive boulder up a hill, only to have it roll to the bottom again once he got it to the top. Sisyphus had angered the gods with his hubris, cheating death, and causing a big kerfuffle. But it’s not his crime I […]

Throw Out the Baby Book

I almost named my website, “That’s Not What I Ordered”, because that’s what ran through my mind when I became a new mom! Just a giggle really, but true nonetheless. A close friend of mine had had a super low-maintenance baby girl, who was sleeping fully through the night by her fourth week, three weeks […]

Not Special

I don’t believe autism is a gift or a curse. It just… is what it is.  I believe it’s genetic and not as random as some might suppose. But I also believe that despite that, it’s still a roll of the dice at the time of conception. Many families are made up of both neurotypical […]