Quote from Kate on April 28, 2024, 3:44 pm

Remember when you were young and fun, well-rested and energetic, and you couldn’t decide between two pairs of shoes so you just got both? How long ago does that feel for you now? Because to me, it feels like a lifetime ago! I kind of feel as though every single parent on earth was wholly unprepared for the cost of having kids. None of us had any idea how much stuff they actually need. None of us had a clue how many diapers and wet wipes they’d go through. Or how expensive doctor’s visits and medications would be. And let’s not get started on how fast they outgrow shoes and clothing. And let’s definitely not touch on how insane school fees can be! Every parent I know, is operating within a strict and often stretched budget. We are all struggling like crazy in this dire economy, with taxes and food costs skyrocketing, and salaries staying stagnant. We can all barely afford our lives right now. And yet… we hang on by our fingernails, because what other choice is there?

Let me tell you, that’s special needs parenting is a budget-killer like no other. We need to buy so much more than other families with just one kiddo! So, so much more. I actually made a list the other day because I was discussing finances with my husband and it’s an eye opener for sure:

1. All of Aidan’s early intervention therapies. 
2. Fun and engaging toys and materials for his play therapy on his program.
3. Fun and engaging toys he can freely access off his program.
4. Devices of all kinds and replacements when he breaks them.
5. Endless iPad and mobile phone games, and their upgrades. 
6. Streaming services for his favourite shows and series. 
7. Replacements for any household items that gets damaged by our busy little man. 
8. Specific household products to clean messes made on floors, walls, and glass.
9. More doctor’s and specialist’s visits than the average child. 
10. Far more medications than the average child.
11. Fragrance-free everything. 
12. Specific products, many of them prescription.
13. Special diapers in big sizes that only come in small packs.
14. The buying and constant replacing of seasonal clothing he becomes intolerant of for sensory reasons. 
15. A whole host of plates, bowels and sippy cups that are tolerable to him.
16. His prescription formula, to manage his allergies.
17. All his special foods and snacks - specific brands only. 
18. Replacement household groceries when he leaves fridges and freezers open. 
19. Fuel! We are almost constantly driving Aidan, and have been since he was born.
20. Sensory toys and activities from specialist websites.
21. Annual passes and memberships to endless venues and activities to keep him busy all weekend and expand his experiences. 
22. Gym equipment for frustrating rainy days at home.
23. Art supplies for the same. 
24. Gross motor activities used in his program such as balance beams and other sports equipment.
25. Sizing up prams and car seats. 
26. Safety equipment for a toddler that gets into everything at home.
27. Childminders/au pairs.
28. The crazy cost of feeding his three-person team and ourselves two meals everyday. 
29. Equipment we use to help him sleep better: diffusers, essential oils, white noise, specific blankets, specific pillows, high thread counts and Egyptian-cotton-everything. 
30. And takeaways on the days we’re too exhausted to cook. 

The secret costs of autism are substantial and ongoing. Every developmental stage requires investment in new items, activities, and routines! Soon, we’ll be looking into special schools and added supports in the classroom. Perhaps mainstream or homeschooling thereafter. Hopefully, college one day! And we will also need to consider any ongoing needs or supports when Aidan is an adult. We are already saving for things he might need once we’re gone!

We are extremely fortunate to have a huge amount of financial aid from family right now, as Aidan’s program is generously, fully sponsored by his grandparents. But our everyday cost of living is definitely a level of financial responsibility we never imagined or anticipated.

We’d love to discuss this more with our readers in our Forum. Registration to be part of the discussion is completely free! Please sign up today and let us know how you’re managing your own costs? And perhaps share any tips or resources that might be helpful to other parents? Hopefully we can all learn something from each other!